h1

god must think it’s funny

July 20, 2007

You know how I’ve been talking about getting a second job? I went for an interview at Marshall’s and it went well. Then my phone was cut off.

I just got my phone turned back on and had two messages. One of which from June 29 was Ms Newman, of Marshall’s, calling to say “We have a training class coming up, and I’d like to offer you a job”. My phone was cut off on the 28th or so, I believe. Yeah.

I just picture God watching as I heard the message. He’s sitting there, grin on his face as I enter the menu to check messages. Eyes slowly growing wider as the look on my face changes with the new information, until finally he’s in tears laughing harder than he has in a while when it’s over. I hope you pissed yourself from laughing. If it helps, I do see the irony in it all. While it’s not so funny for me I can appreciate the amount of coincidences and planning that must have gone into this gag.

It will not spoil my day, but you’re still kind of a dick, God. One of these days I will get you back. Maybe with a pie to the face. An apple pie, not a custard one. And I will laugh until I piss myself too. Then maybe after you’re all cleaned up we can go out for a beer and discuss the meaning of life.

Watch your back.

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